The “Perfect Client:” CBT for Perfectionism
Have you ever thought to yourself…
“If I don’t complete this task at 100% then people will think that I’m not good enough.”
“Making a mistake, no matter how small it is, will expose the truth that I’m an imposter.”
“I’m going to say ‘yes’ to that additional task so that everyone will know I’m competent and capable.”
All the years of high expectations from others have led you to become a perfectionist. There’s nothing innately wrong with being a perfectionist. In fact, some amount of perfectionism, or dare I say “normal” perfectionism, can help us set high expectations for ourselves while also staying flexible to be less precise in the situation that we’re in. However, here’s where things start to become an issue…
We begin to fall out of the so-called “normal” perfectionism when our high expectations are combined with rigidity and highly self-critical evaluation. We may come to believe that nothing can ever be done well enough or that we ourselves are not good enough.
So where do cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) and mindfulness come into play when we are struggling with unhelpful perfectionism?
It helps us reframe the perfectionist thought patterns by
Shifting our perspective
Tolerating uncertainty and ambiguity
Helping us look at the bigger picture
Challenging faulty assumptions with actual evidence
Showing greater self-compassion
CBT invites us to modify our behaviors by
Re-evaluating our priorities
Preventing procrastination
Facing our fears
Not getting stuck in our comfort zone
It helps us manage difficult emotions by
Bringing nonjudgemental awareness of the present moment
Identifying the primary emotions
Understanding how our thoughts and actions impact our emotions.
How therapy can help
If you’re struggling with imposter syndrome, low self-confidence, stress, procrastination, and anxiety because of your perfectionism, you’re not alone. A therapist or mental health counselor can help you unlearn old unhelpful habits and critical ways of thinking while helping you rewrite a new narrative.
References
Anthony, M.M.(2015). Cognitive-behavior therapy for perfectionism [Powerpoint Slides]. Department of Psychology, Ryerson University. https://adaa.org/sites/default/files/Antony_MasterClinician.pdf
Hirsch, C.R. & Hayward, P. (1998). The perfect patient: Cognitive-behavior therapy for perfectionism. Behavioral and Cognitive Psychotherapy, 26(4), 359–364. https://doi.org/10.1017/S1352465898264071
